Loving People, Pro Bono

I was cleaning my baby’s room the other day and had a life changing thought: Love should always be pro bono.  Simply stated yes, but seriously.  Why do we feel like we’re doing each other favors when we are kind?  Kindness is free.  Being there for people is free.  Your time is a gift and should be given as such.  Showing up when you are needed most, is free.  I mean dang we are innately selfish creatures.  We think about what FEELS GOOD or what’s ENTERTAINING or what WE WANT or WHAT MAKES US THE MOST MONEY almost all of the time.  Isn’t this really our biggest issue as a culture?  

I have said this and I will say it again and I hope I always believe it to be true: PEOPLE are the most important thing and we are sick, as a society, in so many ways…in so many heartbreaking ways.  

Women think we aren’t beautiful enough, aren’t skinny enough, aren’t giving enough of ourselves to 

work 

husbands 

children 

friendships 

parents 

homes 

churches 

aren’t smart enough, aren’t capable enough.  

Men think they aren’t strong enough, aren’t providing enough for their family's, aren’t brave enough to fight life threatening addictions to 

alcohol 

porn 

love of money 

entertainment 

lust 

anger 

selfishness

don’t have enough, can’t fix everything.

We’re sick, you guys and I don’t mean we need to start eating healthier (although, that’s another post).  The core of our mission and who we are, at our best selves, is being eaten away by worldly termites.  Slowly, steadily we have forgotten about each other.  We think we are in it alone.  And the ironic thing is that it is actually killing us; these little “feel good” moments of getting high off of what the world tells us is valuable.  We know these things don't satisfy because we become numb/worn down/need more and more and more to feel something, anything.

  

The good news is this:  We still have each other.  There is hope and pro bono love is moving, like the breath of the Holy Spirit,  It is all around us; we only need to be still to feel it.  We need to put down our damn cell phones and look around us.

I have a friend who randomly drops off burgers at my house when she knows I’ve had a particularly stressful week.  (Rachel Gage)

I have friends who pop by, with iced coffees, when they know Jeremy’s been traveling and I need a little company. (Joslyn Strating, Angela Carr)

I have friends who sleepover and love on my children for free; who offer to watch them so I can go on dates with my husband because they know that the best way to love me is to love my children and support my marriage.  (Anna Bruflat, Shae Reinke, Jordyn Wagar, Amy Loftnesess, Meagan Huisman)

I have friends who set up frequent play dates, knowing full well their house is going to be destroyed by littles and our children are going to play and fight, but believing in the power of community and conversation. (April Vander Well, Danielle Shields, Tracy Kirby, Rachel Gage, Ashley Holen)

I have friends who want to share meals when they know Jeremy’s traveling and also know full well I’ll have a high maintenance 4 year old and baby in tow.  (Ali Ter Horst, Crista Ballard, Traci Fredrikson)

I have a neighbor who’s helping me raise my children and trusts me to help raise hers. (Niki Johnson)

I have friends who deeply love my kids, even from a distance; they ache for them, pray for them, check in on them, FaceTime with them, have photos of them in their homes.  (Mandi Good, Rebekkah Erks, Charles Westerman, Mick Westerman)

I have a friend who has an in-home daycare; she’s present, kind, structured, and available to give me breaks so I can do things that feed my soul and open up hours to help me be available to love on others. (Laura Glanville)

I say these things and I write down names because this is how I know HE. IS. HERE.  

This morning, Beck was struggling with a project.  He wanted it to be perfect and he was weeping because it wasn’t. My son is Type A, to the max.  I said, “Things on earth aren’t perfect, Beck.  Life will never be perfect here but it will be someday when we are in heaven with Jesus.”  He said, “I want Jesus to actually be here to help me make this perfect.” I said, “Everything good that comes out of your heart is Jesus here with us.  When you are kind.  When you share.  When you love your friends…those are little glimpses of Jesus.  But you know what my sweet, head strong, beautiful boy?  I wish I could touch Him and sit next to Him and ask Him to fix things sometimes too.”  Doesn’t this just make you want to weep with him?  I mean, it is hard here, right?  It’s hard to feel imperfect all the time.  

Friends,

Money is His, be generous and don’t think about when it will come back to you…it will.

Time is His, be generous and don’t think about when it will come back to you…it will.

Love is His, be generous and don’t think about when it will come back to you…it will.  

It can hurt and sometimes people take advantage of these things but I am going to trust that it’s worth it.  I believe it’s bigger than me.  

The definition of Pro Bono is, “Denoting work undertaken for the public good without charge, especially legal work for a client with a low income".  My soul and spirit sometimes feels low income, doesn’t yours?  What I mean is, there are years/months/days/hours/minutes where I feel empowered, strong, equipped, brave, and capable; like I can give of myself freely and without abandon.  And then there are times where I feel at the end of myself and I need Jesus to take care of me through His people; it's really the only way we can survive here.  My pro bono lovers, I’m taking verses out of Philippians 1 and I mean it, with every fiber of my being, when I say, "I thank my God whenever I remember you and all my prayers are filled with joy.”